Lead Like a Teacher
You’re only a leader when someone becomes better because of you
“What really separates the great from the merely good is the willingness to show others how to think, not just what to do.”
— Whitney Johnson
The older I get, the more I realize, not all leaders know how to teach.
Many can do and direct, very few can inspire and develop. I’ve worked with both kinds of leaders.
One runs projects like we’re nothing but “resources,” pushing tasks down the pipeline like a conveyor belt. The other tends a team like a garden, noticing what each person needs, adjusting the sunlight, watering the dry patches, and pruning what’s not needed.
I’d rather be the second kind, but I didn’t become that kind overnight.
The Myth of Speed
In tech consulting, deadlines are treated like commandments.
“Just get it done by EOD.”
“Sprint closes Friday.”
“We don’t have time, ship it NOW!”
For years, I believed
Move fast = you’re competent.
Move slowly = you’re falling behind.
No one teaches you that pressure. You unconsciously embody it. You learn it by watching the frantic energy around you, the Slack pings at 11:45 p.m., and the way people celebrate speed.
I remember a project from early in my career. I was eager and terrified of disappointing anyone. The Project Manager kept pushing our team. Every weekend for three months was “crunch time”! So I rushed through requirements gathering and assumed everyone knew what I knew.
We delivered on time. But then spent the next four weeks fixing what we rushed. That was the first time I understood something nobody teaches in onboarding:
Speed without understanding is rework waiting to happen.
Years later, when I started leading my own projects, I realized the leaders I admired were not the fastest ones. They were the ones who created independence. They slowed down at the right moments so that the team could move faster in the long term.
Urgent motion impresses people temporarily.
Meaningful direction transforms them permanently.
The Leader Who Taught Instead of Managed
When I was a brand-new Business Analyst (BA), my manager didn’t overwhelm me with threads or CC me on 47 emails. She taught.
We’d have these little 3-minute huddles. She’d lean in with her coffee and speak in simple, direct-to-the-point sentences. Always with the “why,” not only the “what.”
Those micro touchpoints built my confidence more than any course or certification.
She’d show me her thought process:
“Here’s why I phrased it that way.”
“Here’s the logic the stakeholder is looking for.”
“Here’s the part people usually misunderstand.”
“When the best leader’s work is done, the people will say: we did it ourselves.”
— Lao Tzu
Looking back, she was teaching me how to excel in being a BA, and that’s what made her extraordinary.
Becoming the Kind of Leader I Needed
Years later, I was leading a project across time zones. I was older and much more aware of how my behavior affected someone else’s confidence.
One afternoon, a junior analyst messaged me:
“Ms. Mae, why wasn’t my user story approved?”
Old me would have said, “Fix your formatting.”
Then I remembered what it felt like to be new. So instead I said:
“That’s because the story was written a bit vaguely. Want a template so you have a reference going forward?”
We opened the document together and walked through:
why being crystal clear prevents rework
how wording supports devs and testers
what logic the client expects
Afterwards she said,
“Now I get it. Thank you so much.”
The Quiet Teachers
Some of my greatest teachers never had “manager” in their title.
A developer who stayed late to walk me through API calls and what’s really going on in the back-end.
A tester who handed me her UAT flow so I could lead the workshop the next morning.
A teammate who explained a change request in simple, human terms so I wouldn’t freeze with the client when they ask, “Why would it take your team 2 months to build this enhancement?”
They were not obligated to teach me, and yet they chose to. They cared about the project and the team, about doing things right, which is why they taught what they knew.
Patience Is Strategic
Motherhood softened me in the best way. It taught me that patience is a powerful asset.
It prevents escalations.
It prevents misunderstandings.
It prevents small things from becoming big, unmanageable issues.
And when someone feels safe enough to ask, they feel safe enough to grow.
Fear shuts the brain down, while teaching opens it up.
Making Thinking Visible
Teaching does not always require slides, meetings, or structured sessions.
It can be as simple as this one sentence, “Here’s what I considered before deciding.”
That can save days of guessing and avoid overthinking, as well as burnout.
It can transfer judgment, which is one of the most valuable skills any leader possesses.
Every time you share your reasoning, you replicate a piece of your mind in someone else. That’s how teams scale.
How to Lead Like a Teacher
This is the part I’ve learned over nearly two decades in the tech industry.
1. Explain the “why”
Meaning gives people energy. When work has meaning, people show up differently.
2. Share your reasoning.
“Here’s how I solved this before” is instant mentorship.
3. Invite questions before giving directions.
Questions reveal gaps. They also give your teammate space to think out loud.
4. Praise progress
We each have a different definition of what a win is. Even if, for you, something is common sense or super simple, that may not be the case with your junior teammate. Be supportive and excited about how far they’ve come.
5. Keep learning.
Leaders stop teaching the moment they stop learning. The more you learn, the deeper your repository will be for things you can share and help others with. It’s a beautiful cycle of give and take.
The Ripple Effect
A few months ago, a former teammate messaged me:
“Mae, I got promoted today. Thank you for our 1:1 sessions, thank you for supporting me.”
When I read it, I got emotional.
Somewhere out there, she’s probably teaching someone else, maybe one person, maybe five.
And maybe they’ll teach someone, too.
This is how leadership works when done right.
Person to person.
Full Circle
When I picture leadership today, I don’t see titles or org charts.
I picture my first manager leaning over my desk, saying:
“Good question. Here’s how I think about it.”
I’d rather be a leader who teaches while leading, and leads while teaching.
Because at the end of the day…
You’re only a leader when someone becomes better because of you.
Your Turn
Who taught you something that changed how you work or how you live?
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